


Spanky Pants

by derryderrydown



Category: DCU - Comicverse, Outsiders
Genre: Cheerleaders, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-06
Updated: 2009-12-06
Packaged: 2017-10-04 05:20:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/derryderrydown/pseuds/derryderrydown
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roy patted Dick on the shoulder. "Dude, this is a weakness of yours. We need to train it out of you. And if the sight of me in spanky pants doesn't do it, we'll put the outfit on Grace and she can beat you up."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spanky Pants

Roy slumped against the wall. "Dick?"

Dick didn't bother looking up from the screen. "What?"

"Look, we've got pretty much unlimited expenses here."

"You said. Good."

"Yeah." Roy wished he'd delegated this to Grace. Or, hell, Jade was in charge of the finances. But... "Well, they're entitled to check them over. Make sure it's all legitimate expenditure."

"So?"

"There's something logged against your code that... I mean, I'm sure there's a reason for it. But."

"Spit it out."

"A cheerleader's outfit."

There was an infinitesimal pause that, for a Bat, was the equivalent of a scream of horror. "Oh. That."

"The size of it, I thought it might be for Grace." Hoped it might be for Grace. "And it wouldn't be past her to log it on your code." Lie to me. Please, Dick, for both our sakes, lie to me.

Dick cleared his throat. "No."

"But there's a case reason for it? Right? I mean, you've got word of a psychotic gym teacher who's... Okay, all gym teachers are psychotic."

"Not really."

"So... You just decided to get a cheerleader's uniform. For Grace."

Dick still wasn't looking at him. "Not really."

"Dick?"

Dick took a deep breath. "It's in your size."

Roy was going to say something. Eventually.

"Roy?"

"Why?" He didn't think he could _hit_ notes that high any more.

Dick shrugged and rested his head on his hands. "It seemed a good idea at the time?"

"That is _not_ an answer. In no world is that an answer. Why did you buy me a cheerleader's outift?" Roy knew he sounded pathetic. He figured he was allowed to.

"It was... kind of a joke. With Robin."

"Robin wants to see me in a cheerleader's outfit?"

"Something like that."

"Something _like_ that. But not exactly like that." Roy waited. "I mightn't have been trained by the World's Greatest Et Cetera, but I know an evasion when I hear one. If you've been buying me cheerleader's outfits, I think I'm entitled to know why." He swallowed. "I mean, even if it's because you think that's pretty much all I am for the team."

"What?" Dick actually turned round at that. "Roy, you're our information guy. You _find_ these people and then you bring them down."

Roy grinned. "Okay, so you're not hiding that you think I'm useless. What are you hiding?"

Dick's mouth tensed in a way that meant he was hiding a smile. "You're not as dumb as you look. Okay. Robin thinks cheerleaders are hot."

"_Robin_ does? Little freakboy has human feelings?"

"When it comes to cheerleaders."

Roy studied Dick. "You're lying."

"I'm not."

"You are." Roy tapped his lower lip. "Now, _what_ are you hiding? Could it be that _you_ think cheerleaders are hot?"

The mask covered it but Roy just _knew_ that Dick shut his eyes at that point. "Okay, okay, you win. I said that anybody would look hot in a cheerleader's outfit. Robin said there were limits."

"Man, I never knew the Batfamily had such fun conversations. Go on."

"He threw up names. Yours was one of them. And we figured there was more chance of getting _you_ into a cheerleader's outfit than Batman or Superman."

"So this is a..." Roy gestured vaguely. "A control. To see whether you just like cheerleader's outfits or if the person inside counts."

Dick was actually blushing, Roy noted with interest. "Yeah."

"How were you planning on getting me _into_ the outfit?"

Dick had given in and was smiling. "We didn't discuss it that far."

Roy thought about it. "Come on, then. Hand over the outfit."

"What?"

"You heard me. We need to conduct a scientific investigation. We'll watch the college cheerleading championships for a bit and then I'll put on the outfit." He patted Dick on the shoulder. "Dude, this is a _weakness_ of yours. We need to train it out of you. And if the sight of me in spanky pants doesn't do it, we'll put the outfit on Grace and she can beat you up."

"The college cheerleading championships were three months ago," Dick said weakly.

Roy raised an eyebrow. "And you think I _haven't_ taped them for the past eight years?"

* * *

They were an hour and a six-pack of Bud into this year's championship. Five minutes in, Roy had locked his office door and Dick had removed his mask.

Ten girls with identical blonde ponytails had just performed acrobatic feats that even Dick had judged, "Not bad. For their training." He'd sounded rather distracted when he'd said it. Roy wasn't surprised. He was rather distracted himself. His pants were killing him.

Roy cleared his throat. "So. Ready for the control?"

Dick blinked. "Control?"

"Remember? The reason we're subjecting ourselves to this..." Roy's attention wandered to the screen for a moment. "Oh, _god_. Uh, this torment."

"Do we have to do the control? I don't think this is a weakness that'll ever be a handicap in the field."

"We might come up against evil cheerleaders." Roy paused, distracted by the thought of evil cheerleaders and coming up against them. "Evil cheerleaders with long black hair. And tiny little red and black skirts. And black tops. Low-cut, because they're evil. They probably wear stockings. And no spanky pants."

"Pompoms?"

"Definitely."

"Oh, fuck." Dick's head fell back against the wall.

"Dick, I hate to do this to you but it's for the good of the team. Hand over the bag."

Slowly, reluctance plain on his face, Dick did so. Roy peeked inside. "You even got it in red." He looked again. "Red and black?"

Dick nodded.

"You want me to be an evil cheerleader."

"No stockings," Dick said.

"Spanky pants?"

"Yes. Red."

Roy nodded. "Good. Pompoms?"

"Of course."

"Now, shut your eyes."

"You're changing here?" Dick sounded alarmed.

"You think I'm walking through HQ dressed like this? People will see. Even if they don't, there are security cameras. And I would _so_ be blackmailable."

"Good point." Dick looked back at the screen. "Tell you what, I'll concentrate very hard on the screen and you get changed behind me."

"I know your peripheral vision. Eyes _shut_."

"Like it's going to make any difference?"

"You don't see those girls getting changed," Roy said, pointing at the screen. Then he paused for a minute or so. "Showering together. Soaping each other's backs. Oh, _fuck_." He cleared his throat. "Yeah. So you don't get to see me getting changed. Control."

"I'll just be sitting here and... Thinking," Dick said. "With my eyes shut."

With one final check of Dick's eyes, Roy shook the bag out. Black top with a dark red, downward-pointing arrowhead and 'Outsiders' emblazoned across the front. Roy shook his head. Black skirt with red pleats. _Tiny_ black skirt with red pleats. Even little red socks, black sneakers and the promised red spanky pants. And, of course, black and red pompoms.

Roy took a deep breath and started changing. The outfit, of course, fit perfectly. Batman probably had precise measurements on every one of the spandex set. Which would be tricky for Plas and Atom. He grinned as he grabbed the pompoms and struck a pose, hands on hips.

"Okay, prepare to have your sexual fantasies shattered."

Dick still had his eyes shut when he turned round.

"Come on."

"Let me keep my innocence a few moments longer."

"There is _nothing_ innocent about you and cheerleaders. Think of those evil cheerleaders-"

"I am," Dick said fervently.

"-and how you need to fight them. Be brave."

"You have no idea how brave I'm being," Dick said and opened his eyes.

He didn't say anything.

He paced around Roy and still didn't say anything.

Paced the other way round and _still_ didn't say anything.

"Well?" Roy demanded.

"Can you..." Dick gestured vaguely for Roy to lift his arms.

Roy sighed and punched the air with both pompoms. "That helping?"

"I was hoping the hairy armpits would do it but..." Dick shook his head.

"What do you mean?"

Dick sighed. "I mean that this has done nothing to cure me of the cheerleader thing."

"_What?_"

"Seems that you can put anybody in a cheerleader's outfit and I'll find them hot."

Roy blinked. "You think...?"

"You're hot? In that outfit? Yes."

"Fuck," Roy said and pointed at Dick. "You are a sick, sick fuck."

Dick nodded. "I know. Wanna fuck?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because you only want me because I'm dressed as a cheerleader. I'm not that cheap." Roy folded his arms.

"I spent forty bucks on that outfit. That's not cheap."

"Forty bucks of the team's money."

Dick grinned. "In that case, I think the team should get to appreciate the sight. You know I've got a camera in my mask. Oracle could get the pictures round the world before you could even change clothes."

"You bastard," Roy said, laughing.

"You shouldn't have said you were blackmailable." Dick paced forward. "It's your own fault for exposing your weaknesses like that."

Roy found he was backing away until he was pressed up against the wall. "You're not wearing your mask, though."

"Think you could get to it before me?" Dick rolled his shoulders. "You're not _armed_, Arsenal."

"I have pompoms," Roy said. "Pompoms of doom." But Dick was pressed right up against him now and Dick had a pretty impressive weapon of his own. "Perhaps I should dress like this more of-"

And it wasn't actually possible to talk when Dick was kissing you. Specially when his hand was trying to disappear up your skirt and into your spanky pants.

Dick broke the kiss. "Are you wearing anything under those?"

"I was wearing _boxer-briefs_, okay! They wouldn't exactly fit."

Dick smiled. "Oh, you're the _slutty_ cheerleader."

"What did you expect?" Roy leaned forward and kissed Dick. Then he leaned back a little and let Dick kiss him. And, what the hell, let Dick's hands go wherever they wanted. Even when they made it a little difficult for Roy to breathe.

"Hold your skirt up," Dick said, after about three hours.

Roy blinked and licked his lips. "Wha'?"

"Skirt. Hold it up."

"Why?"

Dick slithered to his knees and raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, gotcha." Roy pulled his skirt up. "Spanky pants?"

"I'll do them."

Roy spread his legs a little as Dick crooked his fingers into the waist of the panties. Then, ever so slowly, Dick began to pull them down, about a millimetre at a time. "You can go faster," Roy said.

Dick didn't. Instead, he leaned in close and _breathed_.

"Oh, _fuck_," Roy said.

Dick licked the fabric.

"Double fuck."

Slid his thumbs inside the legs of the spanky pants and _stroked_.

Roy said something lacking all coherency.

He'd lost about half his braincells by the time Dick _finally_ had his underwear round his thighs. He lost the other half when Dick just swallowed him right down.

He might have whimpered. Then again, he might have screamed. There was a roaring in his ears that made it difficult to tell.

It wasn't helped when Dick cupped his balls and started stroking them, in time with hard pressure of his tongue on Roy's cock. Or when Dick moved one finger back and started teasing Roy's asshole.

Breathing was optional. He was pretty certain. He fucking hoped so because it involved too much muscle co-ordination to be _possible_. But he was a polite guy, so he managed, somehow, to say, "M'gonna-" before he was caught up on a wave of bad metaphors and similes and whatever the fuck it was that blowing off the top of his head and making his brain explode like it was the Fourth of fucking July.

Dick sat back and smugly licked his lips.

"Fuck," Roy managed. "You. _Fuck_."

Dick looked even smugger. "Wanna fuck?"

Roy waved a hand vaguely. "Whatever you want."

"Condom?"

"Pocket. Jacket." Roy frowned as Dick rummaged in his jacket. "Lube?"

Dick patted his own boot.

Roy raised his eyebrows. He was aiming to raise just one but didn't have the muscle control.

"Breaking in. Oiling hinges."

"Oh." It made sense. Was also damn useful.

"Condom?" Dick said.

Roy grinned. "Why d'you think?"

"Evidence bag?"

Roy's grin got wider. "Could call it that."

Dick laughed as he walked back to Roy and kissed him, only breaking it to push the spanky pants further down. Roy promptly kicked them off and wrapped his arms round Dick's neck to pull him in closer. Dick's hands on his thighs felt good. Even better when Dick lifted him up and Roy wrapped his legs round Dick's waist, though the suit was too damn slippy to make it easy. Made him glad Dick's hands were still on his thighs, supporting him.

Specially when Dick took a couple of steps away from the wall and staggered slightly. "You weigh a ton," Dick said.

"Solid muscle."

Dick's smile suggested he was thinking something dirty but he didn't say anything as he dumped Roy on the desk.

Roy swung his legs. "Sex on the desk. Very office affair."

"Doesn't really go with the cheerleader outfit."

"Unless it's a teacher's desk." Roy tilted his head and looked up at Dick, batting his eyelashes. "Gee, Mr Grayson. I'd do _anything_ to get an A on that paper."

Dick shook his head, laughing, as he pushed his pants down and rolled on the condom. "Really, Miss Harper?"

"Miss? I hope you're not a biology teacher."

"Would a high school boy be wearing that outfit?"

"Depended on how badly he wanted the A."

"Then lie back and think of that A."

Roy wriggled forward on the desk and leaned back on to his elbows. "Fuck, I want this. Hurry up."

"Shut up." Dick leaned down to grab the lube from his boot and slicked his fingers.

The first touch was cold and Roy shuddered. "You couldn't have warmed it?"

"You were the one telling me to hurry."

"Yeah. So hurry."

Dick didn't hurry but he did slide one finger in. Roy hissed. "Okay?" Dick asked.

"Yeah."

"Been a while?"

"Fuck, no. Opposite. Grace used a strap-on last night."

"Jesus." Dick squeezed more lube on his fingers and pushed a second in. "Let me know if it hurts too much."

"Like I'm just going to sit here and take it? Get a _move_ on!"

Dick shrugged. "If you say so."

The first push of his cock was satisfyingly _alive_ and Roy wriggled. "Oh, fuck, yes. Better than a dildo. Harder."

"Shut up," said Dick and kissed him.

Roy decided to shut up because Dick was doing things with his hips that probably weren't humanly possible. Little twists and tilts and flips and they all translated through to his cock and that just did _incredible_ things inside Roy.

And Dick was pushing his top up, sliding his hands over Roy's chest. Roy gripped Dick's biceps, through the slick fabric of the Nightwing suit, and Roy had been hanging with the spandex set for long enough that that really shouldn't be a turn-on. Didn't mean it wasn't, mind.

Specially not when he could feel Dick's muscles tensing under his grip and when Dick was groaning into his mouth.

Roy bit Dick's lower lip and that got him another groan and Dick seemed to coil in on himself, so Roy slid his hands down to Dick's ass and, man, _more_ tensed muscles and just-

Dick gasped and jerked. "Fuck, yes," he gasped into Roy's mouth and Roy swallowed the words. Squeezed Dick's ass and pushed one finger in.

"Oh, fuck, yes," Dick said and that was it.

* * *

It only took a few minutes to hide the evidence and for Roy to get changed back into his uniform.

"What about the cheerleader outfit?" Dick asked.

"Mine," Roy said, claiming the bag.

"Why?"

Roy grinned. "I might want to wear it again some time."


End file.
